Another Year Older

So I turned twenty one today. I had a great day with my family and The Tallest Fairy. =D


I had my first legal bitch beer today... WOO?

Currently, I'm at Claremore's. He's cooking a late dinner and then we are spending his last night in the states together. =) To be perfectly honest I kindia wish he wasn't leaving. But, I'm also excited for him to have this chance. So many mixed feelings.....

I'll write more later. Hope everyone had a good weekend and a happy Father's Day.

I will stab you....

One more kitchen joke today and someone will be stabbed. Either my co-DM or Claremore.......


I'll keep you posted...

So.. It's Been A While...

So, the original D&D group has pretty much played out. Which I have mixed emotions about....
BUT, we (me and my co-DM) are getting our shit together for the other group to be able to start playing soon. XD. Which I'm very excited about. Granted, this group has more experience playing (which totally scares me since they have play more than me.....)

 Also, The Tallest Fairy and I went on an adventure. We braved the roads in the Fairy Wagon-Cruiser (I know not the name we came up with but I couldn't remember it.) And got horribly and badlyish lost. Yet, we were on the right road. (yes, we are just that talented).  This was a week after we (once again The Tallest Fairy and I) were fooled by a football (a grey one) pretending to be an armadillo. We were very disappointed. (we had tried to sneak up on it...)

I am still job hunting.... Which sucks big ones....

But my laptop is fixed!!! Thanks to my co-DM. =)=)=)=) This makes me happy beyond words..

And I found a bunch of my cds.

And in other news we have made it to the second season of DOLLHOUSE!!!!!!! (yes we are still addicts)

Just perfect....

Snuggling with the boy-check
Staring up at the stars-check
Have a deep meaningful conversation-check
That sweet happy kiss-check


Then he told me to get back in the kitchen.... Why am I with him? jk

Um.... (the rant/ weirdly deep thoughts of today)

So today I'm all about trying to make my brother happy. It was his 16th bday party a month late. Well, long story short none of his friends could come. So we go to kidnap my co-dm and decide we'll hang out or something. Well, outta the blue he brings up things (bad painful memories I don't ever like visiting) I always assumed he didn't know. I stuttered at a lost for words. I mean how do I explain the past? Especially, a past that broke me for a long time but I have move on from and that will hurt him?

I know it's naive but I just want to act like it wasn't the nightmare it was. I don't want him to see the monsters in my closet, not when I fear they could hurt him too. They would change his life. Isn't ignorance supposed to be bliss?

So, I talk to a friend and I tell him about it all. I mean it's the first time my past as come spilling out my lips and on to someone's lap in years. (which both freaks me out and pisses me off). And his grand response, "you're a victim." ....... I just blinked at him and somehow managed not to yell..... to much...
I. Hate. Being. Called. A. Victim. ( I can not stress that enough)
A victim is someone who has no control over what happens to them and/or can not save themselves. (Or at least in my eyes) I stopped being that awhile ago. I will honestly tell you that that part of my past was not my fault. It doesn't always feel that way, but I know it to be true.
If you are going to label me about my past. Call me a Survivor or something. Because I lived though it, still am somedays. When you label me a victim it chains me to being that weak and helpless. The past did that to me already, I don't need you to as well.

I hate my friends... With love.

We (the usual three) hung out tonight.We drove around Tulsa and then grabbed Arby's. (Which was tasty.) Then came back to the Land Of Too Far for a bit of guess......   YEP, Dollhouse. (Almost done with season one! =D But we will be  so so sad when we get to the end and the fact we have no life is reinforced.) But, the night was good and had lots of great jokes made about one and other. (granted if anyone else were to make these jokes about us or our friends. Lets just say a few wells would be needed.... >.>-shifty eyes-<.<)

And at one point, I had said "I hate you both." My dear Dillion replied "But with love". And the fact that if someone were not used to our crazy insulting friendship is going to be a little shocked.So my friends are amazing. Sometimes, well lots of times, a pain ass and they drive me crazy. But I do love them, most of the time.

 But, honestly I have the best friends in the world. Even on days when they are driving me crazy.

One Of Those Crazy Perfect Weekends

FRIDAY- Originally was to be spent with Claremore at bonfire. But it was moved to Saturday. So I ended up driving around and catching up with an adopted brother before going to my friend/co-dm's house to watch Dollhouse.
(Side note- If you haven't seen Dollhouse, Watch it! But be warned it's addicting.... Also DAMN YOU CHARLES AND DILLION FOR EVER SHOWING ME THAT STUPID FRIDAY SONG!!!!!)

SATURDAY- Me and my co-dm/friend helped my dad and step-mother move. Granted it was just down the block and around the corner. But it was interesting..... We thought of some D&D ideas for both of our groups. I need to do research on a few things still for one of the ideas.

Then I went to the bonfire with Claremore. XD It was great. Like amazing great. Then I stayed with him.... (three guesses what we did... ;D)

SUNDAY- I had family come in from way way outta town and we had a small family get together. (Granted we counted 73 people, but that's little for us.) At one point, my younger brother jokingly said to his friend "grab the other arm of her chair and we will throw her in the pool." So what do I do? Hand everything in my pockets to the nearest cousin and tell them to go for it. (Looking back I see the flaw in my judgment. You see, My brother and his friend are 16 and about 6 foot tall and both into being fit and muscly) They proceeded to carry me over to the pool while still in the lawn chair and toss me inti the water fully clothed. It was pretty freaking funny, but called for revenge. Luckily, I happened to have a big can of silly string in my car. =)

Later that night, I watched more Dollhouse with my co-dm and another close friend. =) (We have a problem we know. Damn Joss Wheden for his amazing TV shows....) We were really mean to each other but it was great.

MONDAY- Memorial Day is my mother's family reunion. It was great to see all our family and to visit and eat great food. Then a bunch of us gathered at my aunt's house. I was given like four paper bags full of books. =)  (Fay, if you are reading this, Thanks again!)

That evening was spent running around with my co-dm. And of course more Dollhouse. =)